Earlier today, I agreed to go out on a date. It would seem that I have an admirer nearby, however I’ve no idea who it is. A neighbor set up the idea, which is all it is at this point, like a feeling-out process. Whether this “date” will happen or not isn’t even known at this point, all I know is I’m game. Either way.
The reason I would be willing to do this is not because I want to meet a person who has excellent taste, but to do it for an experience. In the past, before I became comfortable with being asexual, the concept of a date was unappealing because of the overtones it radiates. I’ve had a fair share of encounters and it was as if I had some responsibility to play the appropriate part while on a date, although today I realize that any such expectations would be irrational.
The idea of going on a date with a random person that already likes me would seem like a fun night. While I don’t know if this date will even happen, it certainly got my mind thinking about how I would conduct myself. I am not assuming that this is a sexual person, for all I know my admirer could be A..but I dream! In the case this person is sexual, well I’ve got a few ace cards up my sleeve.
Many times sexual individuals will try to change asexual people, and I’m prepared for this to happen at any time. To officially make this a piece about sports, I’m going to quote the adage “The best defense is a good offense”. Why do asexual people have to be the one that get changed? I will be able to figure out if my admirer is sexual before she figures I’m an asexual, so I could try to change her before her even knows what’s going on. I would have to be so charming that she would forget about sex, and that’s a reasonable objective.
I certainly don’t have to worry about sex on a first date as “etiquette” would put sex on the third date. This probably isn’t followed in the dating world, but it can certainly be taken advantage of by ace. The luxury of knowing that you have a fee dates before sex is “supposed” to happen is refreshing to know.
Flirting, of course, will be present on a date, and that is something that shouldn’t necessarily be especially a problem for ace. Sexual and asexual individuals both share diversity when it comes to many things including flirtation skills. Some of us are born with it, for the others it can be learned.
Body language is something to pay attention to and also something to project as well. This can be learned with practice also. In the case of sexual tension, that is something that ace can use to their advantage. The aforementioned 3-date etiquette leaves much wiggle room for ace to be ace. The first two dates are homecourt advantage for asexuals, and that is plenty opportunity to charm someone into becoming addicted to a personality and/or forgetting about all things sexual altogether.
Thank you for the opportunity to share my day and hope you liked my dating strategy! Thank you WordPress!